Is He Kind?
A few years ago, I was having a conversation with a good friend. She was a newer friend, and we had bonded over working together, being boy moms, and having children close in age. At the time, my son was about to turn two and hers about to turn four.
We were discussing recent interactions with our children’s daycare teachers when she said something that has stuck with me ever since. Her son’s teacher had shared that he was learning his alphabet and numbers right on track — maybe even a little ahead. My friend smiled and responded, “But is he kind?”
Of course, she was proud that her child was doing well. It’s always wonderful to hear that your child is thriving. But her point was that while learning letters and numbers matters, so does developing a kind heart.
If another child is shy, will her son approach that child and offer to play? If a classmate is having a hard day, does he show empathy? Those questions planted a seed in my heart.
For those of us raising only children, “Is he kind?” can be a hard question to answer since we don’t always see our children interact with peers every day. That question led me to another one — how do I teach my child to be kind and to have a generous heart?
And with that question, Giving With Gabriel was born.
“Is he kind?” It’s the question that started it all — and the heart behind Giving With Gabriel.
A Lesson in Generosity
I am a very blessed woman. I have an amazing husband who is the cornerstone of our family. My child is healthy and happy. I have a wonderful job that challenges me and allows me to grow. I work for a company that takes care of its people and provides more than we need — which also means my child has more than he needs.
So how could I teach a two-year-old that he is fortunate? And more importantly, how could I help him understand what it means to give?
I was reminded of two things:
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Teaching anything to a two-year-old is hard! Their attention spans are short, and their distractions are many.
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This had to be a lesson he could grasp. Big words like “kindness” and “generosity” wouldn’t mean much without something he could see and feel.
It was early December, and the world was sparkling with Christmas lights and excitement — but also, if I’m being honest, a lot of getting. My husband and I talked about how to make the season more meaningful. As Christians, we were already doing nightly Advent readings, but I wanted something more tangible for our son.
One afternoon, as I was sorting through his clothes — making “keep” and “donate” piles — the idea came to me: if I could donate clothes, couldn’t he donate toys?
The Santa Sack Project
That night, we introduced what became known in our house as The Santa Sack Project. We placed an empty red Santa sack in the corner of the kitchen and explained to our son that there were other little boys who didn’t have as many toys as he did.
If he put one toy into the sack each night, Santa would use his Christmas magic to make sure it found its way to a child who needed it.
The look of sheer horror on our son’s face when he realized we were asking him to give away one of his toys was priceless — and unforgettable. It took a few nights of gentle convincing and letting him move at his own pace, but slowly, something started to change.
At first, he dropped in a single block or a piece of a broken toy — but over time, he began to choose toys that another child would actually enjoy. And then, on Christmas Eve, he proudly placed his favorite “pickem-up truck” into the sack.
Mornings transformed from reluctant inspections to excited discoveries that his toy had been whisked away — given to another little boy who would love it just as much.
A Tradition of Generosity
The following year, the Santa sack was “delivered” to and from the North Pole by a reindeer. My animal-loving, now three-year-old couldn’t get enough of this magical new character.
I began sharing our tradition with friends and family. They loved it — and some even started their own version of the Santa Sack Project. One dear friend encouraged me to write it all down, to share the story with others.
So that Christmas, over my holiday break, I sat down at my laptop — and the story of Beau and Gabriel poured out of me.
Keeping the Spirit Alive
My hope is that the spirit of our family’s giving tradition captures the hearts of your family, too.
Through Giving With Gabriel, I want to help parents and children rediscover what giving truly means — not just at Christmas, but all year long.
Because in today’s world, where kindness sometimes feels rare, I believe we can build something extraordinary together: a community of children with generous hearts, big imaginations, and a love for giving that shines brighter than any Christmas light.
Family Reflection
As you prepare for the holiday season, take a moment to ask your own “Is he kind?” questions. Talk with your children about what kindness looks like — in your home, at school, and in your community.
You may find, that like our family, one small question can grow into a beautiful tradition that lasts a lifetime.
